WHITE HOUSE SAYS OBAMA'S AUTO-PEN DEVICE OUTDATED
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| The auto-pen device, shown here in the Oval Office, signs documents when the President is unavailable
10-year-old device"leaks ink, squeaks and occasionally flips off the Vice-President," according to White House spokesperson Forkus Fenzle
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DETECTIVES SAY LOCAL MAN MISSING FOR TWO WEEKS LEFT NOTE BLAMING EMPIRE CARPET JINGLE
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